Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
My feet surprised me
Randomize