Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
