new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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