It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize