I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
