she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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