I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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