plz talk dirty to me
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
