Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
