At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Randomize
