I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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