We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
Randomize