is your mom at the bar?
I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
