We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize