I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
