everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
