hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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