Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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