I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I had to cum in my sink.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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