I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize