Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize