Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You can't special order awesome
i think i have herpe
just one?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Randomize