She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize
