He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
