That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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