im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
