you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
