how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
