he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
