Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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