Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
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