If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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