also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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