So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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