Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
