Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
His hands were made for my vagina.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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