So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize