It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Two words: blizzard sex
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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