I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
This baby is an asshole
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize