May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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