Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
