so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
