i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
