god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
