i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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