I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I love how my cats smell like pot.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize