so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize