Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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