Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
cat food counts as protein by the way
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
