That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
